Happy Mother's Day!

The zero people who read this blog know that I don't live in the same state as my family, so this year for Mother's Day I decided it would be cool to come visit and see my mom.  This is the first time in several years that I've been able to visit, and it works very well.  I can see my niece and the 2 moms that are most important to me.  Additionally, I got a chance to see a few good friends and hang out for the first time in months.  Homecomings are always a little melancholy, it's great to see friends and family, but by the same token I can't help but feel disappointed in my hometown.  Some people are comforted when the go back to their hometown and nothing has changed.  There's something comforting about knowing that some things don't change, but when your hometown is known for being an economically depressed, drug riddled, backwater, it's hard to be enthusiastic.  I can't help but feel like the area I grew up in has more in common with Harlan County on the the show Justified than anything else.

The point of this isn't to bitch about where I grew up.  I'm just in a bad mood and it's easier to shit on things than to actually try to cheer up.  I'm still coping with my shit poorly and I'm frustrated by it.  There's so much that I don't understand.  I don't understand why things happen the way they do, and I've always tried to learn from everything in life whether it's good or bad.  I can't find the lesson right now.  It seems like the lesson is try hard, be good, get fucked over anyway.  I'm being purposefully vague because I'm not talking about any one situation.  

What's really pissing me off right now is that I know on an intellectual level that things aren't that bad.  I have a supportive family, great friends, I'm gainfully employed and overall life is treating me pretty good.  Emotionally, I can't reconcile what's actually happening with how I feel.  I feel marginalized, but can't pinpoint why.  I'm irrationally pissed off at people who I have no reason to feel anything but love for.  I'm distrustful of anything complimentary, and none of this is healthy. My therapist assures me that all this is natural, and the lows will get less intense and eventually I'll even out.  I believe her, but at the same time getting better in the future doesn't do shit for me right now.  

They say nothing worth doing is ever easy and I tend to agree with that.  Also, I've always said that growth only comes from discomfort, whether it's physical or emotional.  If both of those things are true, I'm due for an epiphany that will make me some kind of bodhisattva when all this bullshit is over.

I'll be like this, but with a better tan.

You know who kicks ass?  Metric.  I don't know why, but all of a sudden I'm all about Metric and I can't stop listening to them.  Thanks Spotify!  Well, I hope my mom doesn't read this on Mother's Day, this isn't exactly a happy, or well written, trainwreck.  In a last ditch effort to make this happier, I provide for you 2 of the most recent, and entirely awesome Undercovers from the AVClub.  

First up we're gonna go with Nada Surf covering New Order.  I'm not a new order fan, but this is a fan-fucking-tastic cover.  Take a gander:

Nada Surf covers New Order

And now, one of my favorite numbers they've ever had on the AVClub.  It's a very novel idea, a bluegrass band called Trampled by Turtles (love the name) covering an amazing band in Arcade Fire.  Enjoy:



Trampled By Turtles covers Arcade Fire

Call your mom, tell you that you love her.  Don't worry about me, I'll suck it up and get over it eventually...Probably.